Crash-course in Alchemy

Leave, August, leave

I can't wait for August to leave.

This month smells of stale air and work. It is colorless and lifeless. Whereas last year my life was bursting to the seams with getaways and activities, life this year has become so monochrome, with only tapping of computer breaking my day's silence.  Whereas last year I was a walking backpack, traveling to different islands and places; this year, the only destination I have is home and office.

With to travel around the world as my number two life goal, you can just imagine how tragic this current life is to me.

Tonight, I'm hoping as I slip into dreamland, I'll find myself waking up tomorrow with September morning.

Oh yes, September. Why? Because September is fun. September is laughters. September is adventure.

September is

Bohol

!

One Shot.

This blog is still closed. Got new one though. Shoot me there! One Shot.

This Blog is Closed

...Until further notice. I am resuming my business at my new site, Chasing Time With A Sigh.

If you think I owe you one, catch me there daydreaming, counting stars, pigging out, and chasing time with a sigh.

See yah! =)

Visiting Old Friends

I wandered around SM City this afternoon by myself. Unlike other people who can't wander around malls by themselves because they either need someone who can: 1.) Guide them directions (What? You'll get lost in SM City? Haha) 2.) Listen to self-absorbing topics from the most insane to the most trivial 3.) Or act as an ever reliable (not to mention, patient) judge who can assess if the things they buy actually justify the needs - I can.

In fact, there's theraphy when you walk around by your lonesome. Your legs don't just wander aimlessly, your mind too. When I'm stressed out I used to wander around, taking a long route to home, recollecting thoughts after thoughts.

And I can always get to where I want to be when I only have myself to think of. This afternoon I spent myself visiting old friends. It's been eons, I guess, I went inside bookshops. Before, I, together with my old friends used to hop around posh and bargain bookstores in search of different titles. Now, I rarely get to do it. And almost impossible to do it with friends. My current friends don't devour novels. They devour foods - literally. Haha.

And so I found myself inside a bookstore, happily flipping pages upon pages of novels, and remembering I used to finish a book just by standing there. And I used to rummage hard-to-find titles before, and after weeks of searching I'd eventually find them. I used to. I wonder if I still have the patience and passion to do it now that everything is different in its perspective.

But there's one thing I'm sure of, It's always bliss to pay some visits to old friends.

Menger's Guide to Anger Management

IT'S MAD season once again. Under my breath, I keep on repeating the words of WC Fields, "I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally."

For weeks, I keep on snubbing people, even my friends, however it breaks my heart. I indiscriminately dispense sarcastic remarks from grammar corrections to evil observations. My favorite target was my stocky teacher, him who arrogantly marked my essay exams with satisfactory ratings, and couldn't see the frikkin difference between these and this, before and during, discuss and explain.

I am turning into a fiend without having realizing it.

There's reason to this evil transformation, apart from the annoyance that teacher has caused me. But for now, I leave that to myself alone.

So imagine when, out of the blue, a friend asked me (across YM) how I handle anger. I was taken aback, and then I laughed so hard. If anything, I am the last person who knows that. And since I am mad, and all-knowing, I didn't pass up the oppurtunity to be preachy. When you're mad, you'd always welcome the chance to rant, just as drunkard would welcome a bottle of booze.

So here. How to handle anger my way:

1.) Do not talk.  Do not think.  Do not feel. In other words: Be indifferent.
2.) Blast your speaker, and then scream, howl, and shriek! Headbanging, and throwing your arms and legs around would also do the trick to take those anger out of your system.
3.) Get a diversion. Go out with your other friends. Different faces, different surroundings, different lives would help you break away from the people and place that have caused you one.
4.) Write, write, and write. In my case, I blog, blog, and blog. I almost regularly update my blogs - all because I'm mad. Hmm. Methinks, I could finish a book when I'm always mad. So, bring in the madness!
5.) Lastly, devour - do not eat - devour pizza with your friends. There's no explanation to this, except that devouring makes you feel barbaric.

Changing

There will always be lonely in change.

Change is memory you get from old quizzes, informal themes, and love letters stocked inside a long-ago box. It is your old home, the one you no longer live, but still remember every inch of its space - the wooded floor, the dilapidated kitchen ware, the number of gaping holes in your former room. It is your old beloved pair of leather shoes you wore in your JS Prom, the one you no longer wear, but remember how it felt when your feet were still inside of it.

I remember my last day in high school, we were passing folders where we could write farewell letters to each and everyone. One female classmate wrote me a long one with a last note that says: Don't you dare forget me. Love lots, J.

We met again four years past inside a cab. We were exchanging glances, wondering if we're going to greet or pretend we didn't know each other. I had forgotten her name. I moved out of the cab not greeting her. That was the last time I saw her.

I wonder if the faces I constantly meet today I'd forget their names in the future. Because things change, people change.

Pen is mighty, mightier, and mightiest

On my way home yesterday, I saw a cameraman perched atop a studio van, looking for a best angle across the streets.

I miss working in a media. I used to work and write before in our college publications. And although not really mainstream, our work might as well be one. Almost daily we run of articles and post them in strategic walls around the campus for every student to see - and read.

It was exhilarating. The reasons why I joined - and stayed - in our publications because of two words. Power and Freedom.

Power because with your article - be it news or column - you can inform the uninformed, educate the uneducated, and persuade those who are in the middle or in the opposite side of the fence to join your stand. Power because with your humungous Press ID you can get inside a fullpack gym without questions, arrogant it may sound and look. But that's the way it is. You're a Press, you cover the event.   

Freedom. Need I say more? The chance to write your thoughts for everyone to see and read is liberating in itself. Back then, blogs were unheard-of, and the oppurtunity to write in a publication was the most liberating thing to do.

And you might have noticed why I didn't include Popularity. For the reason that it is easy to be unpopular while you are in a media. It is not easy to take a stand. There will always be people who do not agree with you, most especially to those you subject in your articles.

One time a REed teacher accused us of libel after we ran a news article of him being charged by his students of inconsistency of grading systems. Another university officer charged us of false report after we issued an expose of "him" having ex-deals and negotiations under the table. For a year, my staff and I almost spent ourselves being summoned in a hearing of a university kangaroo court. Apparently, the composition of the so-called administrative court was against us, and even before they issued a verdict they had us vindicated.

But these are only spices of being a mediaman. Still, it pales in comparison to being powerful - at least in the eyes of the students. The freedom to have your thoughts written on paper is beyond compare, not even the slapping of complaints could demoralize you.

Because at the end of the day, those students and some faculty who came up to you and commend your work for a job well done is more than enough to keep you writing. And writing. 

Pen is still mighty, mightier, and mightiest. 

Dear Dodong,

YOUR DAD must have missed you. Achingly.

I saw it in his eyes. All my life I've always seen joy or emptiness of people's eyes. And rarely sadness. You dad's, yes, your dad's eyes were that. You should have seen it. He had the eyes of a person who has seen ten years of trials, hardships, and sufferings. And rightly so. My heart goes out for him.

You left so suddenly, you see, without telling. He thought everything was alright, because you still  managed to laugh while your brother horsed around  in front of you. You never even showed signs of getting tired of life, because you rarely whimpered.

Until one night you were gasping for breath. Your dad thought it was just one of those coughs. But little did he know you were struggling for a bad case of bronchitis. And your one-month old body could not take the pain any longer, you just stopped fighting, stopped breathing, stopped living.

And though he was holding back the tears, his eyes were welling.

Your dad must have missed you. So achingly. He must have partly blamed himself of failing to foresee it coming. I don't blame him. It's always a big blow to all dads not being able to protect their young 'uns.

And I have missed you. Although I rarely saw you, or even heard about you, I miss you. And I'm guilt stricken too. With all the rift in our families I have ultimately given up my responsibility to you. Now, you're gone. And in your one month stay in this world, we hadn't shared a moment. Or two.

Your grieving uncle,

John

Dear Life,

... I'm back!

I'm definitely brimming with stories to tell, you see. But I couldn't decide where to begin. One thing for sure: Staying in Siquijor for three days and two nights was fun, and adventure rolled into one. It was definitely a blast! Excitement hasn't left my system yet since day one.

Tomorrow, I will let our pictures do the talking. And when I can catch my breath, I'll try to scribble away our stories...

Right now, lemme hug my bed, kiss my pillow, and say goodnight to my wonderful mom who just celebrated her birthday today.

Life is beautiful. God is great. How could I doubt?

Inches closer to bed and wide awake,

Me

Siquijor in a Heartbeat

Yehey! My bag is packed, and I'm off for a new adventure!

I'll be leaving for Siquijor this 4 am. Yep, you heard, er, read me right. That long white shoreline. That piece of paradise. And that island you always associate with magic, dancing human papers, and ungo, balbal, and wakwak.

Funny because I'll be there for a Regional Leaders Conference of Singles For Christ.

I can't wait.

If I find flying broomsticks and magic potions,  I'll give you one.  Hahaha